The other day I told someone, “Since entering college I feel like my relationship with the Lord has been in a constant state of confusion.” I have seen and experienced so much in four years that now when I’m beginning to near the end, it seems like I am finally able to catch my breath and have some sort of retrospect. These last four years, I have been incredibly shaped by A) The Church, collectively, B) Traveling, nothing will change your world view like backpacking through SE Asia, C) Education, I have learned A LOT, the bags under my eyes show it, and I still don’t know A LOT, D) The SPERO Project, their mission is continually shaping and challenging my perspective.
This Monday (3-3-14) I am attending a discussion hosted by SPERO featuring the author of Disunity in Christ, Christena Cleveland. I’m only two chapters into the book and it is completely rocking my world. It puts into words thoughts I have but was convinced I was the only one thinking them, it challenges my selfish ways of viewing people, and confronts racial, theological, and social differences in the Church and the divisions it can cause. This book is too challenging to not share as it challenges my perspective, my view of community, and how a separatist attitude based on social, racial, or theological differences is not a good enough excuse to not “be One.”
So I ask for grace in your opinions. Mine are continually being shaped and I am making no claim to a supreme rightness of my thoughts. These are just my reflections and my story of a worldview that has been continually influenced by the Church, how it has affected me, and how this book is shaping what I once saw as the socially acceptable and right Christian norm. So first, a little about my faith background.
Going to a private Christian conservative Nazarene college hit me with a wave of culture shock to some extent. First, I had to Google what “Nazarene” even was. I actually even spelt “Nazarine” wrong on my thank you letters for graduation presents. Until this point, my life had been surrounded by the mega ship that is, the Baptist Church. Through my childhood and teen years there was this sense of pride associated with being Baptist. We had the largest Church camp. Our churches had cool youth buildings, mine was named “The Rock House.” We went to Super Summer. And Hello, have you ever heard of the IMB? I mean, Come on. The Baptist Church was the ultimate shizz. (#ThingsOnlyChristiansSay) When I committed coming to SNU it was because of their jazz group The University Singers and I got a small tennis scholarship. The fact that it was Christian had little to nothing to do with it. However, it seemingly became a much bigger deal than what I ever imagined. When I told some of my friends, I was met with the response “Don’t go there! Nazarene’s believe you can lose your salvation!” God forbid the long held tradition of “Once saved always saved” met an opposing opinion. This sent me into a flurry of rushing into my teacher’s office and Googling, “Theological differences between Nazarenes and Baptists.” People at Church told me, “So, you’re switching sides on us, are you?” And then some how when I came to school, comments from “the other people” seemed to affirm the same attitude but from the “opposing” side.
Given, I probably showed up to school with my big Baptist belt on, convinced I wouldn’t be influenced by the system. I was above it all. So let me take my fair share of the blame. I’m sure I showed up with my Baptist Supremacist attitude and snubbed my nose the entire first semester. Honestly, my nose is probably still a little stuck up in the air. Not to the Nazarene Church. Just to “The Church” in general. But more on that later, I’m a continual work in progress. Anyways, I was greeted with the same attitude I held about my own tradition. I had comments made about the theological opinions I had been told my whole life, some in very derogatory ways. I felt like an outsider for not attending summer camps with everyone. It seemed the majority of people were somehow distantly related. I was a weirdo to not have been raised in the Nazarene Church and was exposed to all kinds of new religious terms such as, “Nazarene Nap” and “Nazaringdom”. Even this past year after four years of attending here, I heard someone make a comment after working at a Baptist Camp all summer, “It’s so great to be back around Nazarenes after spending all summer with those Baptists.” Although said in a joking manner, there was a little bit of truth.
My first two summers in school, I lived overseas in SE Asia. My world view went into “wide screen mode” real quick. I met Buddhists, animists, random European and Canadian pot smokers, traveling homosexual theologians from Denmark, and then a community of local and foreign believers. These people came from different countries, faith traditions, theological opinions, but they were united in their work. They were striving to bring light to the darkness and the title which they carried seemed to matter little compared to the work they were doing. I intentionally asked people what organization they were with, what denomination they were sponsored by, what was the heart behind the work they were doing, and it began to occur to me. There is more than one way to do ministry.
I was introduced to SPERO, my sophomore year. They have been changing my life since. I love SPERO because they equip The Church. They work with Catholics, Nazarenes, Baptists, and Non-denominational churches. They continually challenge me that we can accomplish more together than separate.
SPERO seeks to “Confront injustice and oppression by mobilizing the Church to fully engage in a Biblical response to under-resourced populations.”
SPERO has shaped, defined, and refined my love for the international community through connecting me with intentional relationships to international refugees, they have taught me through conferences and teaching seminars, and connected with me on a personal level. They have shown an incredible amount of patience with my over enthusiasm and lack of thinking before speaking.
Since stomping on the grounds of SNU with my proud Baptist heritage, I have been humbled. I have been taught. I have been confused. Angry. Loved. Challenged. Served. Poured Into. I have had words of life and value spoken to me. I have disagreed with people. I have been changed. I have seen the Church is much larger than any denominational statement of faith can hold.
The other day, when speaking of denominations, someone asked me, “Well, what are you?” My answer, I feel in no way, shape, or form compelled to answer. Nor do I feel prepared at this point in my life to answer. And I’m not sure it’s a necessity to know the answer in order to serve the Kingdom of the Lord. Let me first say, I believe Jesus is better. I believe He brings life, love, compassion, fulfillment, order, and reconciliation. Following Him is not driven by fear of a God who might smite me but because I believe He brings peace. He cares for the afflicted, the orphan, the black, the white, the widow, the prostitute, the Muslim, the homosexual, the prisoner, the rich, the poor, the middle class white girl who talks to much (me), and he draws no division as to which is worth more.
So that’s where I’m at going into reading this book. I’m proud of the faith tradition I come from but I also realize, it’s not the only avenue in which the Lord can work. For the majority of my life, I was naive enough to think otherwise. It also ticks me off to some extent when I drive and see six or more churches within three blocks. I still don’t actually know why. Disunity in Christ, does not bash on denominations. It celebrates the diversity that they bring. However, when we become elitists, when we categorize who is “Right Christian and Wrong Christian”, when we become secluded to only interact with people “like” us, who think like us, who view God the same way we do, we do an injustice to what the fullness of the Body of Christ is meant to be. The Church is a multi-cultural diverse body of believers.
I’m stoked. I’m confused about the majority of things in life. But I’m stoked on it. I look forward to sharing my next blog post detailing more about the actual content of the book and how it’s shaping my faith.
Living Freely and Abundantly 